Nobody Actually Understands What Capitalism or Communism Means
If you ever want to invoke in yourself the desire to throw your body headfirst into a threshing machine then simply wade into an internet discussion that is ostensibly about communism. Or socialism, or for that matter, capitalism. You will quickly find out that nobody knows what any of these words mean. Except maybe communists who, in my experience, usually do have a pretty good understanding of their own ideology. And I say usually, because Jackson Hinkle exists.
Particularly during the American election season you’ll see conservative politicians throwing around the “communism” libel because that old injury called Vietnam still aches sometimes and gets nationalists all agitated when you poke it. For the most part, politicians in educated countries have a decent understanding of what communism and capitalism actually are, so you know that when they accuse their opponents of communism they are always lying.
That said, America’s status as an educated country is dubious and lying implies intent to deceive so if there’s one defence I can offer for Republican officials it might be that they’re mostly just stupid? We know Donald Trump doesn’t know what communism is. We sure as hell know Elon Musk doesn’t. But they’re all pretty sure that the word alone sets people’s dark humours aflame so they keep using it as liberally as they can. Why hone the sophistry skills refined over a hundred generations when you can do the rhetorical equivalent of throwing a fistful of corn to a brood of hungry chickens?
I always get a few people upset at me in this column when I directly criticise capitalism and I’ve always found that odd because vigorously defending capitalism if you’re not a moustache-twirling cartoon character with a monocle feels to me like vigorously defending long lines at the DMV. The only thing that gets me more backlash from Substack than a critique of capitalism is when I say something in support of vaccines.
But it’s not a pushback like I’m saying something personally offensive to people so much as a defensive, corrective kind of pushback. Like I’m agitating for something deeply unpleasant, and it occurs to me that a lot of people more or less conflate the economic system of capitalism itself with “the concept of owning stuff or getting stuff” and “the freedom to do what you want with your money.” Furthermore, the absence or regulation or reform of capitalism is the encroachment of its only alternative, communism (or socialism, as they’re often conflated) which is “not owning stuff” and “being told what to do with your money.”
Capitalism, communism, and for that matter socialism and most of the isms really are actually big ol’ fuckin’ super-duper complicated systems of economics that people dedicate entire careers to studying, and these big ideas have been boiled down and simplified so much over time (and a fair bombardment of propaganda) that the layperson doesn’t even know what they are anymore.
I’m not even going to criticise capitalism in this week’s piece! Shit, I might even throw a curve ball and criticise socialism instead. I’m wild and crazy and can’t be predicted or stopped. But I do want to lay down some definitions because for all the complexity there are some basic 101 facts that you can learn in five minutes that will put you head and shoulders above your typical Turning Point USA pundit.
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